BY MIKE FUHRMAN

While sharing her experience of nearly losing her own daughter, Susan Tolle encouraged a group of parents and grandparents to be aware of suicide warning signs and the actions to take when someone they know is contemplating ending their own life.

Recognizing the difference between when someone is sad and when they are clinically depressed can be critical to saving that individual’s life, Tolle told those who gathered at First Presbyterian Church on Sunday evening.

Warning signs include talking about killing themself, stating they have no reason to live or that they are a burden to others, that they feel trapped or are experiencing unbearable pain.

When you observe these things, you have to take action, Tolle, a long-time volunteer for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, told the group.

“You have to ask the direct question, ‘Are you thinking of killing yourself?’ she said. “You have to ask that question. You have to get all the cards on the table.”

As difficult as it might be, asking that question is part of a caring conversation in which you express concern for the person’s health and safety, make them aware of resources that are available, and seek professional help.

If the person is in imminent danger, do not leave them alone, Tolle stressed. Seek immediate help by calling 9-1-1 or 9-8-8.

The Statistics

Some of the statistics related to suicide are staggering:

♦ There are nearly 50,000 suicides in the U.S. each year, and there are an estimated 100 to 200 suicide attempts annually for every death by suicide.
♦ The number of deaths by suicide in the U.S. increased 36 percent between 2000 and 2022.
♦ Suicide is the third leading cause of death for young people (age 10-24).
♦ Iredell County has the 9th highest suicide rate among North Carolina’s 100 counties.
♦ In 2021, 22.2 percent of high school students who participated in a survey reported seriously considering suicide during the previous year — and 10.2 percent reported attempting suicide one or more times.

What Can We Do?

Recognizing when someone is suicidal and knowing how to respond are essential skills for all parents and grandparents, Tolle said.

But that is just the beginning.

As a society, Tolle said, we have to eliminate the stigma associated with mental illness and suicide. If we viewed depression the same way we did diabetes — as a treatable medical condition, we could significantly reduce the number of suicide attempts and suicides, she said.

Nine out of 10 people who die by suicide have a diagnosable mental illness, according to AFSP research.

Symptoms that may be indicative of mental illness include unexplained changes in behavior, agitation, increase in anxiety, changes in sleep patterns and appetite, and thoughts about suicide.

Seeking treatment for mental illness is key to reducing the number of suicides, Tolle said.

Depression, which is among the leading causes of suicide, can be treated and managed with the use of antidepressant medications and therapy. Antidepressants are effective in 80 percent of patients, and many patients report improvement within four to six weeks, according to AFSP studies.

Yet two-thirds of people who experience symptoms associated with clinical depression do not seek treatment.

There are other steps parents and grandparents can take to keep the people they love safe, such as securing firearms and prescription and over-the-counter medications.

According to the AFSP, firearms are used in 69 percent of completed suicides, making it the most common method. Suffocation is the second most common method and pills/poison are No. 3.

Resources

Visit the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention website at www.afsp.org.